How to Deal?

So lately I've been dealing with death a lot.
Not in the sense that family members or people especially close to me have died. It's just that people connected to me have had people die. And it breaks my heart for them, it scares and confuses me. How would I ever deal with that? And how do you make them feel better? It's not like anyone can have the magic words to make your world go right again. Because the world is seen in a new way, it has taken from you.
     My friend knew this guy who was only 21. He died in his sleep and they don't know what of. I'm not saying she was super close to him, but he was there in her life. She thought he was funny and goofy....and she never expected him to be gone. It's so horrible how the little things like that can make us think....what would we do if we lost a friend? A parent? A sibling or even a neighbor?
     I think death might be the thing I'm most afraid of. Not for myself(well, not that much) but for the people around me. Because I can expect all sorts of bad things in life. They are going to come and knock me down, scar me and change me. But most problems can be fixed. Death can't be "fixed". It's too permanent, like a thorn that constantly aches under your skin.
     Some might say we shouldn't be sad when people die. Some may have been taken from their suffering, it was God's timing...God's plan. Well, yes it was God's plan. That doesn't mean I have to understand it right away, does it? That doesn't mean I  have to jump up and down with joy that a person has been ripped from my life.
      And I'm not yelling at anyone who can accept change and grief like that. I understand that maybe it's better for them. The fact that they have that much courage and faith amazes me. I'm just being honest when I say there is no way I could act like that, and that sometimes I hate death. That it has to happen and screw with so many people. I mean, we are human. We react in human ways.
      With grief, with anger, or solitude, or confusion or fear. What really scares us is that there is no way to avoid death.
       You can hide form a car wreck by not driving, you can keep yourself from getting hurt in a relationship by not dating or numbing yourself to love and emotion. but death is the ultimate force of change. And there is no way to stop change, to keep things the same as you like them.